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{"id":3525,"date":"2021-07-10T18:13:17","date_gmt":"2021-07-10T23:13:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.midwesternmeditations.com\/?p=3525"},"modified":"2021-07-10T18:13:17","modified_gmt":"2021-07-10T23:13:17","slug":"mmem-s17e9-plastic-sealed","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.midwesternmeditations.com\/?p=3525","title":{"rendered":"MMeM, S17E9 \u2013 Plastic sealed…"},"content":{"rendered":"

…for your safety.\u00a0I’m\u00a0sure\u00a0it’s\u00a0just me. Every time I open a new container that is wrapped in cellophane, I fail. Oh sure,\u00a0it’s\u00a0all perforated for a perfect, simple, clean opening process, but no!\u00a0I am\u00a0incapable of opening a new package of anything with safety seals on it.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

The problem is I am left with a naked container of who knows what. For example, I like Chapstick. Let me re-phrase that, I need Chapstick. It is one the things I need to get through the day. But, whenever I am faced with the daunting challenge of starting a tube of Chapstick, I know I will be left with a white, naked, unidentifiable tube of lip\u00a0balm\u00a0for which I will never know what it\u00a0contains\u00a0until it touches my dry lips. I prefer mint flavored. However, I never know what I am getting anymore because I\u00a0cannot\u00a0master the safety seals without tearing them like a low land gorilla so that the entire\u00a0wrapper\u00a0comes off.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

$\"\"$ <\/a><\/p>\n

Damn you Tylenol tamper person from the ’80’s!\u00a0Grrrr! It is all your fault.\u00a0That is\u00a0really the only known instance of product tampering ever recorded. Now, every stinking thing for sale is shrink wrapped like\u00a0it’s\u00a0ready to survive a nuclear holocaust, a shipping accident to the bottom of the sea, or a hurricane.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

I know the manufacturers think they have gone the extra mile with the carefully\u00a0perforated\u00a0lines marked “open here”, but they\u00a0do not\u00a0work! I hate this so much.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Again, I know\u00a0it’s\u00a0small, but\u00a0it’s\u00a0one of \u2018the\u00a0little things.\u2019<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"