MMeM, Vol.2 Issue 4


Look, it’s no secret that “cleaning house” is not one of my favorite things to do. But, every couple of fiscal quarters I get the urge, or rather the necessity, to clean a little bit. Oh, I have a method and it’s carefully thought-out and then executed to perfection so as to not waste any energy or cleaning effort. 

For example, I always vacuum first and then dust. My thinking here is that the vacuum is sure to throw microscopic dust particles into the air. Then, when I dust 20-30 minutes later, I’m sure to pick up all these particles while dusting, having allowed them just enough time to float down to their new resting places.

So, I was vacuuming the other day and boy was I getting into it. I vacuumed my entire upstairs. I ran the vacuum in straight paralell lines and then in some rooms I even back back ACROSS the grain of the previous vacuuming path. Man! I was really into it today. “I’ll bet my carpets haven’t been this clean since the day they were installed!” I thought. 

It really was a sight to behold. I flew from room to room, vacuuming. Vacuum. Neat word. It’s a noun and a verb. Not a lot of words with the rare double “uu”. 

I even thought that I could make a living cleaning houses. Sheesh! I could probably bring top dollar with my vacuuming acumen alone!

Having vacuumed all the rooms in my first floor house I returned the vacuum to its resting area in the laundry room. As I left the laundry room I thought, “Boy, I’ll have to empty that bag-less container before I vacuum again after such an thorough and complete vacuuming session such as this one!”.

“And women think men don’t clean well. Hmm!”, I mumbled to myself as I puffed my chest out ready to take on my next house cleaning task. As I closed the door to the laundry room I thought, “And come to think of it, that vacuum is probably about ready to be replaced due to the strenuous workouts I put it through. 

Seemed like I had to go over, and over, and over the same dirt and dust time and time again.

Hmm. Oh well. Guess they don’t make them like they used to.”


About

Blogger, in search of humor, always. Writer of MidwesternMeditations.com, formerly hosted on Blogger.