MMeM, Vol.13 Issue 35 – 2017 Change Part 1 of ?

Enter, the pay phone graveyard.

Change. It’s usually thought of as disruptive and unsettling. Then again, change takes place constantly and at such a rapid pace today that you almost don’t notice it. I used to think that I hated change, but technology and innovation have helped to slowly change (pun intended) my mind.

Taking a look back at how things were always done before can be valuable perspective on ways to do things better in the future. Learning from history and past  failures so as to not repeat them again is one of the adages we often hear, and more often ignore.

At any rate, when one looks around there are reminders of the not so distant past everywhere. Moreover, there are absences of what used to be all too common everyday conveniences of the day. Take pay phones. We know where they’ve gone figuratively, but where do the actual phones go when they die? Nobody needs pay phones today. Need to make a nefarious somewhat anonymous phone call now? No pay phone? No problem. Get a burner phone, use it, toss it.

Enter the pay phone graveyard.

Ah, the public pay phone. Who could ever forget all of the convenience, the increase in cost, the switch from coins to swiping cards, the GERMS? Back when you used actual currency with a pay phone, didn’t you always check the coin return at the end of a call to see if you got change for some reason? Then, there was the urban legend that someone was putting HIV laced needles in coin returns of pay phones. That legend almost rivaled razor blades in candy bars at Halloween.

Yes, the pay phone will always hold a special place in our hearts as can be seen in the museums above.

MMeM, Vol.13 Issue 34 – If U can’t have. U want.

At first glance one is SHOCKED!

Maybe, just maybe, the way society deals with laws and regulations is backwards. I know it sounds crazy at first, when someone proposes something completely against the grain or out of the ordinary. But when nothing else works or after years of failure, maybe a new way will succeed?

What’s that saying, how’s it go? “We’ve always done it this way.” Yeah, I don’t know about any of you, but that phrase is cancer to business and progress, in my humble opinion.

This way of thinking struck me when I saw this story a while back about the slaughter of rhinos all over the world for their horns. You’ve heard about this idiocy. It’s disgusting and ignorance on the grandest of scales. In Asia it’s believed by some that rhino horn can be used “(with no medical backing) ― to cure everything from cancer to impotence.” For years, zoos and wildlife refuges have been forced so chainsaw off horns of rhinos in order to keep poachers from killing them for their horns.

Then NEWSFLASH, South Africa is planning to push legislation to legalize the rhino horn trade. BOOM! At first glance, one is SHOCKED! But, give it a couple of minutes, let it sink in, and you begin to realize that making it legal will cause the illegal demand driving the killing to cease. As the story reports, breeders have stockpiles of rhino horns. They will be able to flood the market. Of course, at first they may make a pretty penny too, but that will dwindle away  as well.

The debate goes back and forth, “Who’s right?” or “Who’s wrong?” One thing is for sure, had the sale of rhino horn never been illegal it would never have become more valuable than gold or cocaine. At any rate, it’s certainly worth a try.

It’s like Mark Twain once said, “The more things are forbidden, the more popular they become.”

MMeM, Vol.13 Issue 33 – The CLAW

How, was it never my little brother?

Now I know, everyone has gone through spells where they can’t pass up wasting coins on “THE CLAW” machine. You know, you’re probably at a restaurant waiting for a table or you’re shopping with your mom for school clothes, for college, whatever. Anyway, these rip-off robots are too enticing. Oh, and put one in a bar? Forgetta-bout-it!

If you’re anything like me, my friends, or siblings you’ve even gone so far as to judge and grade machines on the level of compacted-ness of the pieces of crap in them. How well did the vendor pack the “plush” stuffed toys down into the cube thus making them nearly impossible to pull up with the equally worthless piece of crap “claw-crane”? Sometimes you’ll spot a few outliers that other suckers came close to retrieving but failed, in so doing leaving them in prime pick-up positions.

Then again, even supposed grown-ups such as ourselves would gaze into these third-rate torture devices and dream about having our way with the little plexiglass fortress. No? Well, we weren’t the only ones. Seems this poor little 3 year old boy, Jamie, found himself in this crane toy machine and his 5 year old brother, Shane, was there to witness it. My thanks to the father for posting the pics and video for me to live out my little childhood dream.

The surprising thing to me about this story is, “How, was it never my little brother?”

MMeM, Vol.13 Issue 32 – Worst method EVER!

keep me shying away from scales.

Ok, I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not the best grocery shopper in the world. Much of this shortcoming is my own fault and the result of poor planning and failure to make lists, think ahead, shop when I’m not hungry, etc. However, this isn’t all my fault. For example, why do grocery stores insist on selling items “by the pound?”

Who are they, high level drug dealers? You cannot tell me when you are standing at a meat counter or the deli counter that you know what a pound of pork sausage will end up looking like or a pound of macaroni salad. What’s more, they know this. They know that you (ME) are a moron. They do this because it’s exact, for them.

It all snowballs into the healthier eating paradox of shopping, preparing, cooking, and attempting to eat better. Well, if this “by the pound” method of selling food is so hotty toddy why don’t restaurants and fast food places do it to try to seem more established and respectable like their grocery store counterparts? “Yeah, I’ll take a pound of french fries and a 1/3 pounder thickburger…” Oh, ok I stand corrected, kind of…EXCUSE ME!

This story got me thinking about this topic the other day. A guy tried to buy a small container of mashed potatoes from Whole Foods for lunch one day and when he got to the check-out his side of mashed potatoes came to, wait for it…. $14! It wasn’t his fault. Who can carry weight-to-size measurements in their heads for the plethora of items in a grocery store? No one, at least most males that I’ve ever known anyway.

I don’t know, maybe it’s just me and this guy at Whole Foods, but my fear of accidentally mis-purchasing by price-to-amount-measurements-volume-calculation will always keep me shying away from scales.

MMeM, Vol.13 Issue 31 – WELL, that isn’t SpACIAL?

WELL, that isn’t SPECIAL

Wouldn’t you think that a Satanic Temple based in Massachusetts would have something better to waste their GOD forsaken (LITERALLY) money on than a billboard in north Texas?

This billboard went up in March of 2017. When contacted by local media, the Satanic Temple said their reasons for the billboard’s placement were in response to an assistant principal’s corporal punishment (spanking) in 2012.

Hmm, either this “temple” is working through quite a backlog or recently came up with a misguided statement for which they wanted an even more undeserving target.

Yeah, I have Dana Carvey as SNL’s Church Lady running through my head right now too. But, the only problem is, yes, it actually is SATAN!!!!

Just how many new members do they get from this? What kind of recruitment number does this campaign net for the Satanic Temple? Oh to be fair, I’m sure there are parents upset with schools for spanking their snowflakes, but even them, EVEN those snow machines aren’t calling THE SATANIC TEMPLE for help and refuge!

No, I refuse to believe they got any calls from non SATAN believers. Perhaps it was all a PR move to show that no, they weren’t out to recruit and train more disciplinary minded assistant principals in order to aid them with more sadistic corporal punishment. IF that was in fact the purpose of this ad, then, well-played  Satanic Temple, well-played indeed.