MMeM, Vol.2 Issue 4

Look, it's no secret that "cleaning house" is not one of my favorite things to do. But, every couple of fiscal quarters I get the urge, or rather the necessity, to clean a little bit. Oh, I have a method and it's carefully thought-out and then executed to perfection so as to not waste any energy or cleaning effort. 

For example, I always vacuum first and then dust. My thinking here is that the vacuum is sure to throw microscopic dust particles into the air. Then, when I dust 20-30 minutes later, I'm sure to pick up all these particles while dusting, having allowed them just enough time to float down to their new resting places.

So, I was vacuuming the other day and boy was I getting into it. I vacuumed my entire upstairs. I ran the vacuum in straight paralell lines and then in some rooms I even back back ACROSS the grain of the previous vacuuming path. Man! I was really into it today. "I'll bet my carpets haven't been this clean since the day they were installed!" I thought. 

It really was a sight to behold. I flew from room to room, vacuuming. Vacuum. Neat word. It's a noun and a verb. Not a lot of words with the rare double "uu". 

I even thought that I could make a living cleaning houses. Sheesh! I could probably bring top dollar with my vacuuming acumen alone!

Having vacuumed all the rooms in my first floor house I returned the vacuum to its resting area in the laundry room. As I left the laundry room I thought, "Boy, I'll have to empty that bag-less container before I vacuum again after such an thorough and complete vacuuming session such as this one!".

"And women think men don't clean well. Hmm!", I mumbled to myself as I puffed my chest out ready to take on my next house cleaning task. As I closed the door to the laundry room I thought, "And come to think of it, that vacuum is probably about ready to be replaced due to the strenuous workouts I put it through. 

Seemed like I had to go over, and over, and over the same dirt and dust time and time again.

Hmm. Oh well. Guess they don't make them like they used to."